


Rhea's Biggest Mistake

by ProfessorByleth



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: #LetAsheSwear2020, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Group chat, Multi, Nonbinary My Unit | Byleth, Other Relationships to Be Added - Freeform, Pre-Timeskip | Academy Phase (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), modern setting but it still takes place in garreg mach if that makes sense, no beta we die like Glenn, other characters to be possibly added later
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-12
Updated: 2020-12-03
Packaged: 2021-03-05 06:21:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 5,062
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25229770
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ProfessorByleth/pseuds/ProfessorByleth
Summary: Lady Rhea allows the students of the Officer's Academy to make group chats in hopes this will strengthen inter-house relationships. Little does she know, it will be the biggest mistake she will ever make.
Relationships: Annette Fantine Dominic/Mercedes von Martritz, Ashe Duran | Ashe Ubert & Yuris Leclair | Yuri Leclerc, Caspar von Bergliez/Linhardt von Hevring, Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Claude von Riegan, Dorothea Arnault/Petra Macneary, Edelgard von Hresvelg/Bernadetta von Varley, Felix Hugo Fraldarius/Sylvain Jose Gautier, Ferdinand von Aegir/Hubert von Vestra, Hapi/My Unit | Byleth, Marianne von Edmund/Hilda Valentine Goneril
Comments: 67
Kudos: 129





	1. The Chaos Begins

**Author's Note:**

> So this is my first work on here. I've been reading things on here for a while, but just got around to actually making an account. I'm going to try and update this every day, but once school starts that may become difficult. This is just a silly group chat fic that may contain spoilers for the game if you have not completed it, but it takes place in part one so there probably won't be anything you haven't already seen. There may be spoilers for the Cindered Shadows dlc however, so read at you own risk if you haven't played through that. I myself have not completed all of the routes, so keep that in mind as well. Another important note is that all characters (except for Lysithea since her age is important to her character) will be at least 18. This is because, as I mentioned before, this takes place in part 1 of the game, and I'm not looking to make anyone uncomfortable. If the character was already 18 or older, their age will not change. 
> 
> Nicknames! (nicknames may vary, however it should be easy to tell who it is. These are just regarding the main chat.)
> 
> Byleth: gender who?  
> Dimitri: his highness  
> Dedue: geodedue  
> Sylvain: sylbane of my existence  
> Felix: beware of felix  
> Ashe: I'm baby  
> Ingrid: fun killer 5000  
> Annette: smol bean  
> Mercedes: mom  
> Edelgard: Edie  
> Hubert: Hubie  
> Ferdinand: Ferdie  
> Caspar: Caspie  
> Linhardt: Lin  
> Bernadetta: Bernie  
> Dorothea: chaotic bi  
> Petra: she will get the victory  
> Claude: the b o i  
> Hilda: delicate little destroyer  
> Lorenz: mayo man  
> Ignatz: the art friend tm  
> Raphael: b e e f  
> Lysithea: not a child tm  
> Marianne: make her cry and die  
> Leonie: jeralt's no.1 fan
> 
> I will add the Ashen Wolves in later but they won't appear for a little bit.
> 
> I also apologize in advance for formatting issues and grammar/spelling issues.

Officer's Academy-Main Chat

Archbishop Rhea is online

Archbishop Rhea: Students, I have consulted with the rest of Garreg Mach's faculty, and we have decided to allow you all to have a group chat. There is the main group chat, and separate group chats for each of your respective houses. Professor Byleth and Seteth will be monitoring your activity. You are free to make separate chats, and private chats at you own will. The faculty, and Your house leaders all have admin rights. Admin rights can be given, as well as revoked. Please do not make me regret this decision. Have fun.

Archbishop Rhea is offline

gender who? is online

gender who?: I have already assigned everyone nicknames, however your house leaders all have permission to change them. Have fun kiddos.

Edie is online

Edie: I will try and keep everyone under control when you are unavailable, my teacher 

gender who?: that would be appreciated Edie

his highness: we will all try our best

the b o i: you got it, teach!

gender who?: do not disappoint me.

gender who?: I'm looking at you claude.

the b o i: oi

gender who?: is offline 

his highness: why don't we go to our house chats, and then regroup here?

Edie: that sounds like a good idea

the b o i: aight

The Black Eagles House Chat

Edie: everyone, Lady Rhea has created us all group chats! There is also a main chat with all of the students. You can also feel free to create your won separate chats. I have admin rights, so if there are any issues, bring them up with me.

Hubie: If you disappoint Lady Edelgard, you shall not live to see another day.

Edie: Hubert, I appreciate the concern, however the threats are not needed. 

Hubie: I'm just doing my job.

Bernie: d does this mean I don't have to leave my room??

Edie: only for class, Bernadetta

Bernie: o ok that's good

chaotic bi: who made our nicknames I want to hug them.

Edie: that would be the professor

chaotic bi: I'm going to hug them right now

Ferdie: Hubie, must you always feel the need to threaten us

Hubie: Yes. Especially you.

Lin: well this explains why my phone was blowing up. I was trying to sleep.

she will get the victory: I am very much liking the idea of the group chats as well! I have hope everything works out

disaster bi: I'm sure it will Petra, provided the other houses behave as well

Caspie: HELL YEAH! A group chat sounds awesome!

The Blue Lions House Chat

his highness: Everyone I have an announcement! Lady Rhea has created a main group chat with all the students, as well are our separate house chats. I have admin rights, so if there are any problems, bring them up with me. Professor Byleth has given us all nicknames, however I can change them if you would like.

sylbane of my existence: wow the professor is a savage. I'm not sure how I feel about this

beware of felix: these names are amazing

I'm baby: SYLBANE OF MY EXISTENCE WJGFKFTFKHERANKHMGSJKAGHWIRHGRKEWHI

smol bean: LMAOOOOOO

fun killer 5000: ,

fun killer 5000 is offline

beware of felix: someone is salty

mom: I'm going to go make sure Ingrid is ok

geodedue: Hopefully everyone behaves so we can keep this privelige

his highness: why do I have a feeling this won't end well...

Golden Deer House Chat

the b o i: Golden deer assemble!

delicate little detroyer: here!

maker her cry and die: h here...

jeralt's no. 1 fan: Here!

not a child tm: here

b e e f: Here!!

the art friend tm: here

mayo man: Must we do something so childish? And why is this my nickname, Claude?!?!

the b o i: I was just about to explain that

the b o i: Lady Rhea is trusting us all with group chats, and we can make our own private chats if we so choose. I have admin rights, so come to me with any problems. Teach provided us all with nicknames, so don't come for me mayo man.

gender who? is online

gender who?: take any problems to ME please. Other than that, have fun.

gender who? is offline

not a child tm: LOL not even the professor trusts you

mayo man: With good reason. And Claude, please change my name

the b o i: no

mayo man: ...

mayo man is offline


	2. The Mystery Of Teach's Sixth Sense

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See chapter one for nicknames :)

Officer's Academy-Main Chat

Edie: How did everything go?

his highness: chaos has not started in my house yet. Except I think it's safe to say Ingrid does not like her nickname.

fun killer 5000: that assumption would be correct, if not an understatement your highness

Edie: ah.

fun killer 5000: I wonder if Professor Byleth realizes what they've done

gender who? is online

gender who?: oh I definitely realize what I've done

gender who? is offline

fun killer 5000: hold on

fun killer 5000: Professor

gender who? is online

gender who?: yeah

fun killer 5000: :o

gender who?: you did need something, right?

the b o i: how do you just pop in out of nowhere when we mention your name?

gender who?: you'll never know~

the b o i: I know what this calls for

Edie: why does that scare me

his highness: Claude, please don't do anything stupid

the b o i: I won't

his highness: thank goddess

the b o i: for now

Garreg Mach Detectives

the b o i: everyone we have a mystery to solve

fun killer 5000: Professor Byleth just pops out of nowhere when their name is mentioned, and none of us know how

delicate little destroyer: do you think they have some sort of sixth sense?

the b o i: you may be on to something Hilda

delicate little destroyer: well I contributed. Can I leave now?

the b o i: no

delicate little destroyer: fine

sylbane of my existence: have you tried just asking them how they do it?

fun killer 5000: of course I have. Look at the main chat 

sylbane of my existence: ah ok

beware of felix: why am I here

sylbane of my existence: because I am

beware of felix: you're the reason I want to leave

sylbane of my existence: you wound me, Felix

delicate little destroyer: ouch I think you just got rejected buddy

the b o i: that almost hurt to watch

fun killer 5000: that's rough buddy

the b o i: anyway, let's all meet in the library, and we can talk about this there.

beware of felix: I have better things to do. This is stupid I'm not coming

fun killer 5000: yes you are

beware of felix: I'll come when I'm dead, plus three days just to make sure

sylbane of my existence: you wouldn't even come to see your best bud?

beware of felix: all the more incentive to NOT come

delicate little destroyer: OOF

the b o i: Ingrid, make sure he comes. and grab a black eagles student as well since Teach is in charge of their class.

fun killer 5000 added chaotic bi to Garreg Mach Detectives

disaster bi: what is this and why does it scare me

fun killer 5000: scroll up we're solving a mystery

delicate little destroyer: Dorothea, meet us in the library after class ok?

disaster bi: alright. I've been wondering how they do that too I won't lie.

Garreg Mach Faculty (and Flayn)

Seteth: Professor Byleth would you mind explaining why some of the students are screaming in the library

Byleth: They're probably trying to figure out how I pop in when they mention my name

Seteth: how do you do that if you don't mind me asking?

Byleth: I have the chat up on my phone when it's not up on my computer at all times, so I get notifications every time they mention me.

Seteth: would you like me to tell them?

Byleth: let them have their fun.


	3. The Mystery Of Teach's Sixth Sense: Part 2

Officer's Academy-Main Chat

gender who?: Claude, Ingrid, Hilda, Sylvain, and anyone else who is having a mental breakdown in the library, do us all a favor tone it down

I'm baby: I'll try and quiet them down

gender who?: thanks Ashe

his highness: so that explain all that noise. We can hear it from the dormitory it's a bit obnoxious

Caspie: I can hear it all the way from the training grounds!

I'm baby: They should be quiet now

the b o i: we will continue to be quiet on one condition

gender who?: what's the condition and why am I scared

delicate little destroyer: TELL US HOW YOU JUST POP IN CHAT WHENEVER YOUR NAME IS MENTIONED

beware of felix: they've been screaming for too long. I value my hearing so please just tell them

gender who?: alright fine. I have the chat up on my phone at all times if it's not up on my laptop, so I get a notification if my name is mentioned.

beware of felix: thanks

the b o i: we thought you had some sort of sixth sense

delicate little destroyer: all that theorizing for nothing

chaotic bi: well this is anticlimactic

fun killer 5000: may I request something professor?

gender who?: sure

fun killer 5000: please change my nickname

gender who? changed fun killer 5000 to crazy horse girl 5000

crazy horse girl 5000: ,

crazy horse girl 5000 is offline

I'm baby: LMAO

I'm baby: btw has anyone seen Sylvain? when I went to the library to quiet everyone down he wasn't there 

delicate little detroyer: he ran to the infirmary after getting hit over the head with an encyclopedia

I'm baby: I'm assuming Felix did that

delicate little destroyer: yep

I'm baby: not suprised. I do hope he's ok though.

The Blue Lions House Chat

his highness: Mercedes, apparently Sylvain got hit over the head with an encyclopedia and is in the infirmary. Can you make sure he's ok?

mom: I saw him running I'm on my way there

beware of felix: when you get there tell him I am in no way sorry

smol bean: I'm sorry Felix did WHAT

beware of felix: he was screaming at the top of his lungs. I would have hit everyone but Dorothea took the encyclopedia from me

geodedue: please refrain from injuring you classmates

I'm baby: don't worry I saw it all happen and gave Felix a good whack too :)

smol bean: your use of a smiley face after that sentence is making me uncomfy

I'm baby: hehehehhehehehehehhehehehhehh :) :)

smol bean: stop

I'm baby: HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE :) :) :)

beware of felix: you know what I'm out

his highness: I believe Ashe has completely lost his sanity

I'm baby: you can't lose something you never had

his highness: ...fair point

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By the way, sorry if these chapters are pretty short. I can try to make them longer in the future if you guys want. Thanks for reading!


	4. Baby No!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter is a bit later than I usually upload one! I went to bed super late and woke up at 1 pm ;w;

The Blue Lions House Chat

smol bean: hey do you guys know where Sylvain is? class started 30 minutes ago

mom: He's still in the infirmary with a concussion

I'm baby: oh shit is he ok?

smol bean: :O

mom: child no

I'm baby: what did I do

horse girl 5000: ASHE!

geodedue: oh dear

I'm baby: WHAT DID I DO????

his highness: oh no

I'm baby: oh it's because I said shit isn't it

horse girl 5000: ASHE!!!!

I'm baby: I can say whatever the hell I want I'm an adult

his highness: Ashe does have a point. He may be the youngest of all of us, but he isn't a literal child

gender who? is online

gender who?: let the baby swear if he wants. also GET OFF YOUR DAMN PHONES YOU'RE IN CLASS!

his highness: apologies professor. We will get off our phones for the remainder of class

geodedue: we are sorry

smol bean: I started the conversation so I take responsibility

gender who?: It's ok. just get off your phones and we will never speak of this again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this chapter is super short. I didn't have much motivation to write today because of some personal stuff. I'll make up for it tomorrow I promise.


	5. The Wild Ashen Wolves Appeared!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just wanted to say a quick thank you to the people who left kudos and kind comments on this fic. I've really enjoyed making it and this means a lot to me!

Golden Deer House Chat

the b o i: Golden Deer Assemble!

delicate little destroyer: Here!

jeralt's no.1 fan: Here!

the art friend tm: Here!

b e e f: HERE

delicate little destroyer: Raph, caps lock

b e e f: here

make her cry and die: h here

not a child tm: here

mayo man: ...here

the b o i: I've noticed a few strange figures while sneaking out to get some snacks from the dining hall last night

delicate little destroyer: I saw them too

not a child tm: sorry wot

the b o i: think you should stay out of this Lysithea. what if they're ghooossssttttsssss~

not a child tm: FREJHKTLREGBTI4WU

make her cry and die: I think I just saw her run to her room... I'm going to make sure she is ok even if I won't be of much help...

delicate little destroyer: that's very sweet of you Mari <3

jeralt's no.1 fan: did you see what they looked like at all?

delicate little destroyer: they were gone so fast we couldn't make out what they looked like.

the b o i: all we know is there were four of them.

the art friend tm: you should probably bring this up with one of the professors

the b o i: good idea

Officer's Academy-Main Chat

the b o i: @gender who? me and Hilda saw some strange figures in the dining hall last night. There were four of them

gender who?: I will ask the rest of the faculty about it. Thank you for bringing this to my attention

Garrreg Mach Faculty (and Flayn)

Byleth: Claude and Hilda saw some strange figures in the dining hall last night

Seteth: Why were they in the dining hall past their curfew?

Byleth: That isn't the point. Does anyone know who these strange figures could have been?

Archbishop Rhea: They were most likely the Ashen Wolves. An unofficial fourth house. They rarely come up to the surface I'm sure they just wanted a snack. Pay them no mind

Byleth: oh ok

Officer's Academy-Main Chat

I'm baby: GUYS

the b o i: what happened

I'm baby: I JUST SAW SOMEONE BUT THEY WENT BACK INTO THIS HOLE 

the b o i: they might be one of the people me and Hilda saw. what did they look like?

I'm baby: they were wearing something that looked like our uniforms, but white grey and silver instead of black and gold. They were pale and had purple hair

gender who?: Rhea informed me there is an unofficial fourth house underneath Garreg Mach. She told me to pay them no mind but I say we investigate

his highness: I shall go. Ashe why don't you come with us. If we find any tricky locks, or if you run into that person again, you could be of great help

I'm baby: I'll be right there, Your Highness!

the b o i: Hilda, you come with me. 

delicate little destroyer: where ever you go, I go!

Edie: Linhardt, come with me. We could use a healer if things get rough.

Lin: may as well. I get a nap after this though

Edie: fine you can have as many naps as you want for a week

Lin: I'm right here

-quite a bit of time later-

gender who? added eyeliner on fleek, hot coco, beast master, and baltie to Officer's Academy-Main Chat


	6. Choose Your House!

Garreg Mach Faculty (and Flayn)

Archbishop Rhea: I believe I told you to not pay any mind to the underground residents, but seemingly as you have added them to the main chat I guess I have no choice but to do this.

Byleth: do what

Archbishop Rhea: I shall allow them to join one of the three houses. They may choose which class they join.

Byleth: was expecting to get fired lol

Archbishop Rhea: They've been without a proper education long enough. The one's that did go to the academy never got to finish their time.

Byleth: ah ok

Archbishop Rhea: Do not make me regret this

Byleth: don't plan on it

The Ashen Wolves House Chat:

gender who?: I have good news! Lady Rhea is allowing you to join one of the Officer's Academy's three houses

eyeliner on fleek: This is a suprise. The Archbishop generally likes to forget we exist

beast master: woah proper education finally

baltie: I'll join the Golden Deer! Hilda would probably kill me if I didn't

hot coco: I shall join the Black Eagles! I was originally from the empire after all!

eyeliner on fleek: I'll join the Blue Lions. during my time at the academy I was there. They also seem like the most functional

beast master: I'm with Yuri-Bird

gender who?: that settles it then. Why don't you go say hi to your new classmates

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is also pretty short. My motivation levels have dropped so low they're probably all the way down in hell so yeah ;3;. Tomorrows chapter will be longer hopefully.


	7. Immediate Regrets

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There was no chapter yesterday because my brain completely forgot to write. By the time I remembered, I couldn't use the computer because my mom was on it.

Golden Deer House Chat

gender who? added baltie to Golden Deer House Chat

the b o i: welcome the the house of memes

not a child tm: fear the deer

delicate little destroyer: BALTIE!!

baltie: Hilda!!

delicate little destroyer: now tell me everything that happened between you and Holst

baltie: uh

delicate little destroyer: SPILL

baltie is offline

mayo man: great job Hilda you already scared off our new classmate.

delicate little destroyer: well sOrRy

make her cry and die: it's ok Hilda... Holst is your brother after all

delicate little destroyer: see! someone understands! Thank you Mari

Blue Lions House Chat

gender who? added eyeliner on fleek and beast master to Blue Lions House Chat

I'm baby: Yuri!

eyeliner on fleek: hello to you too, old friend

his highness: Welcome to the Blue Lions!

sylbane of my existence: I'm back! Did you miss me

beware of felix: nah

eyeliner on fleek: Ashe says no, but he's too busy hugging me to type

horse girl 5000: not really

sylbane of my existence: well damn

beast master: your nickname says all I guess

beware of felix: I like this person

beast master: oh right we still have to introduce ourselves

eyeliner on fleek: you probably already could have guessed, but the name's Yuri. Former house leader of the Ashen Wolves

beast master: hapi

Black Eagles House Chat

gender who? added hot coco to Black Eagles House Chat

Edie: Welcome to the Black Eagles, Constance!

hot coco: Edelgard! I'd like to ask you a favor

Edie: if it's about your house, I'm sorry to say I can't do much of anything.

hot coco: I see... I still look forward to the rest of the year with you all!


	8. Important!

So this is isn't actually a chapter. I just wanted to say that I won't be updating this for a few days due to personal reasons. I love you all and I love writing this, but I'm taking a break for a little bit. I'll be back soon don't worry :).


	9. Important 2

Also not a chapter. I won't be updating this for a while because I'm just going through a rough patch right now. Do you ever just feel sad and you can't explain it? That's kinda what's happening to me right now. I've also had some stuff happens recently that's gotten me down, and I've had some... Not pleasent thoughts. I don't know when I'll update this again, and I'm sorry if y'all are disappointment. A huge thanks to everyone that has supported this fic, and especially to those who left kind comments, or ideas for future chapters. I'll be sure to stay safe. I just haven't had much energy to do... Well anything. I've mostly been sleeping, hoping it will help. No surprise here, it hasn't lol.


	10. Rhea trolls the students

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GUESS WHO'S BACK! Yep! Sup guys I didn't die :). Still not feeling my best, but I finally have motivation to update this so here we are.

Garreg Mach Faculty (and Flayn)

Byleth: @Archbishop Rhea I JUST GOT THE BEST IDEAAAAAAA

Archbishop Rhea: ...why does that scare me?

Byleth: ok so change your nickname to something where no one can tell it's you, and troll the kiddos

Archbishop Rhea: I guess it wouldn't hurt to have a little fun. Alright.

Black Eagles House Chat

immaculate: hello there.

Edie: er... who are you..?

immaculate: I won't tell.

Bernie: W WHO ARE YOU? WHAT DO YOU WANT? PLEASE DONT KILL MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

immaculate: oh dear.

chaotic bi: I apologize on behalf of Bern there. She's a tad bit eccentric

Caspie: that still doesn't explain who this person is tho?

Hubie: If you go near Lady Edelgard, don't expect to live

Lin: you woke me up

Ferdie: Hubert, please refrain from threats

she will get the victory: who is the person?

hot coco: I would like to know who this individual is...

immaculate: you'll just have to figure it out yourself

Blue Lions House Chat

immaculate: hello there

his highness: May I ask who you are?

geodedue: That would be nice

sylbane of my existence: uh who is that??

beware of felix: the fuck???

smol bean: FELIX! LANGUAGE!

beware of felix: stfu

mom: f e l i x

beware of felix is offline

horse girl 5000: who the heck is that

I'm baby: i n t r u d e r a l e r t

beast master: uH

eyeliner on fleek: who the hell are you...?

immaculate: you'll just have to find out

Golden Deer House Chat

immaculate: hello there

the b o i: dafuq

delicate little destroyer: who the hecc is u

b e e f: uhhhhh

the art friend tm: who is that?

mayo man: ...

jeralt's no.1 fan: uHhhHHHhhHh

make her cry and die: w who are you?

baltie: who invaded the chat

not a child tm: LMAO Y'ALL ARE DUMB

the b o i: um-

not a child tm: it couldn't be anyone new, since they would've had to have been added. the only other person in here besides the professor is Lady Rhea

immaculate: ...

the b o i: LMFAO WE SO STUPID

delicate little destroyer: LOL HI RHEA

The Officer's Academy-Main Chat

immaculate: one person has figured out who I am

not a child tm: it's Rhea guys. If it wasn't she'd had to have been added to the chat, and the professor didn't changer their nickname. Rhea is the only other person in here

sylbane of my existence: WE'RE SO STUPID-

I'm baby: you guys didn't know??

not a child tm: well at least Ashe is smart

eyeliner on fleek: I figured out pretty quick. just had to check the members

not a child tm: and yuri

Bernie: I'm just glad it wasn't an actual intruder.....

Lin: you guys are real stupid wow

Edie: I can't believe I did not notice that

his highness: ...

smol bean: I think my iq just dropped

mom: annie are you ok?

smol bean: no

delicate little destroyer: GUYS CLAUDE JUST PASSED OUT FROM LAUGHING TOO HARD LMFAO

his highness: is he alright??

delicate little destroyer: (r.i.p_claude.img)

make her cry and die: oh dear...

not a child tm: andd there goes hilda too (idiots_on_the_floor.img)


	11. Bernie Bear

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guess who's actually going to finally get to developing the relationships I have tagged. It'll be a while for me to get to all of them, but it's gonna happen.

Private Chat-chaotic bi, Bernie

Bernie: Thea, I uh.. I need some help

chaotic bi: what do you need Bern?

Bernie: I w want Lady Edelgard to l like me

chaotic bi: never fear Bernadetta dear, for I am here!

Bernie: I don't k know how to talk to her

chaotic bi: oh dear.. if you're even stuttering while typing then it must be bad

Bernie: a am I a lost cause?? I'm sorry if I'm bothering you! I'll n never talk to you again!!

chaotic bi: Bernie dear, I can promise I've dealt with a lot worse

Bernie: o oh ok

chaotic bi: why don't I arrange a tea party for you two this weekend?

Bernie: o ok sure!

chaotic bi: I'm sure Edie would be delighted to spend time with you, Bern

Bernie: a any tips on t talking to her?

chaotic bi: I suggest dropping the formalities. Edie prefers it if we treat her as if she was just another student.

Bernie: t thanks Dorothea!! 

chaotic bi: you're welcome Bernie

chaotic bi: have fun on you're date~

Bernie: d date?? fghgmyrtjyjthytu6e5yzjsury564w

Bernie is offline

Private Chat-chaotic bi, Edie

chaotic bi: Edie dear, Bernadetta would to have tea with you this weekend!

Edie: Bernadetta? Really?

chaotic bi: yep! I knew she'd eventually try to warm up to someone. Seems you're the lucky girl!

Edie: I honestly was starting to lose hope she'd ever leave her room for anything other than class

chaotic bi: I know right? The poor girl is terrified of everything!

Edie: tell Bernie bear that Saturday would be best :)

chaotic bi: b e r n i e b e a r

Edie: what?

chaotic bi: you're too cute Edie

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter would have been longer, but my mom was forcing me to go to bed, as it's 1 AM when I'm writing this. I'll have their little tea party in the next chapter :3. I'll probably update tomorrow, since I'm really excited to write it, so stay tuned!


	12. Operation Edeldetta

Operation Edeldetta

chaotic bi: alright it's Saturday we need a plan

sylbane of my existance: what are we doing?-

chaotic bi: we're going to spy on them fool 

sylbane of my existence: oH that makes sense

delicate little destroyer: I was talking to Edie earlier. She's having her tea party with Bernie in the gazebo

chaotic bi: good. that means we have a few places to hide

sylbane of my existence: bush disguise? 

delicate little destroyer: yeah please don't

sylbane of my existence: awww :(

chaotic bi: we're not using disguises Sylvain.

sylbane of my existence: you're no fun

delicate little destroyer: Bernadetta is heading there now follow me

chaotic bi: k

sylbane of my existence: already here

delicate little destroyer: oh hello-

chaotic bi: Edie just passed through she's heading there

delicate little destroyer: Bernie's here

sylbane of my existence: so is Edelgard

delicate little destroyer: SHE JUST CALLED BERNIE BERNIE BEAR AWWWWWWWW

chaotic bi: sorry I'm late! so that explains why Bern is so flustered

sylbane of my existence: this is the cutest thing I've ever seen awwwwwwwwwww

chaotic bi: wow Bernie is having a conversation with her I'm proud

delicate little destroyer: looks like Bernie took you advice Thea she's talking to her like a normal person

sylbane of my existence: why do I feel like we're being watched

chaotic bi: uh oh

delicate little destroyer: IT'S HUBERT ABORT MISSION! I REPEAT! ABORT MISSION! ,FKGHIGETJHLKGU9

sylbane of my existence: VFRFLHYGVRLHGEJKETIUGUYR3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a question for you all! What's your favorite Edelgard pairing? You can probably tell mine is Edeldetta, but I'm curious about you guys.


	13. New Classroom Rules

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the non existent update schedule. I swear I'm trying lol.

Black Eagles House Chat

Edie: ALRIGHT EVERYONE! I HAVE AN ANNOUNCEMENT! There will be some new rules for the Black Eagles!

1\. Do not be mean to Bernie bear. (punishment for failing to comply will be severe)  
2\. No threatening faculty, or each other. (HUBERT!)  
3\. No trying to strangle other students (HUBERT!)  
4\. No sleeping in class (LINHARDT!)  
5\. Respect the teachers (literally everyone in here, you guys aren't ok)  
6\. Don't try and constantly one up each other, it gets tiring (FERDINAND!)  
That is all. Failure to comply (especially to rule one) WILL result in severe punishment. What is this punishment? You don't want to find out.

Bernie: rmjtywt3qregthfhdrsesrgh

Bernie is offline

chaotic bi: why do I feel these rules are a bIt passive agressive

Hubie:...

Ferdie: I...

Lin: don't care what the punishment is. I like my naps

Edie: LINHARDT

Lin: ok damn

Caspie: suprised there isn't one aout breaking things

Edie: I'm adding that to the list. This will be in the classroom, I just decided to let you all know beforehand

gender who?: just so you all know, I helped Edie with these and 100% approve

hot coco: That means there is no way out of this, is there?

gender who?: nope

she will get the victory: I am liking these new rules! Though I do feel some are having the passive agressive

Edie: I'm aware. That was the point.

chaotic bi: ah. 

gender who?: if it keeps you guys in check, then it's ok with me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bgshfbsbd It's so shortttttt. I've been having a small absence of inspiration right now so that's fun. If you would like to send me help, my discord is berniewithasideofchaos#7387. I would very much appreciate it.


	14. Sooooooo I start school tomorrow

Obligatory not a chapter. I'm starting school tomorrow, so because of that, there may only be a few updates a month. Depends on how much work I have, and how I'm feeling. Sorry about that. I'll try and update if I have the chance.


	15. Marianne and Hilda being cute

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I'm suprisingly not dead! Yeahhh I know this is a day late. I meant to update yesterday, but family got in the way and stuff happened. Like I previously mentioned, I started school recently, and well, school is shit. I hate it already and it's only been what, 2 weeks? Soooo here's a short chapter of Mari and Hilda being wholesome.

No mayo man allowed

not a child tm: I'm bored do you guys want to bully Lorenz?

make her cry and die: jhifkvdkifdBHJFE

make her cry and die: w was that a good keysmash

delicate little destroyer: yes sweetie that was a great keysmash <3

b e e f: awwwwww

jeralt's no.1 fan: ok that's sweet

art friend tm: awwwww

not a child tm: we live for this wholesome content

Private Chat-the b o i, delicate little destroyer

the b o i: "sweetie"

delicate little destroyer: look, being mean to Mari is a crime worthy of a punishment worse than death

the b o i: that's true

the b o i: but

delicate little destroyer: what are you getting attttt

the b o i: ya know, you're not subtle

delicate little destroyer is offline

the b o i: I-


	16. Look at that I didn't die.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So uh.... How long has it been? I'm so sorry guys! I've been so busy with school and it's taken a lot out of me. I've not only had zero motivation to write, but zero motivation to just do anything in general. So just uh... Bear with here a little. Thanks to everyone whos stuck with me through the rough patches! Love y'all! Also I'm doing this on my phone at 3 in the morning so isn't that great.

Private Chat: Hilda, Marianne

Hilda: heyyy Mari

Marianne: ?

Hilda: I got something to ask you 

Marianne: o ok

Hilda: how would you like to have tea with me this weekend?

Marianne: s sure!

Hilda: ok! I'll see you then sweetie <3

Marianne: <3

Private Chat: Claude, Hilda

Claude: I- you're so not subtle

Hilda: wHy WERE YOU LOOKING OVER MY SHOULDER WKDNWKWKEJDNDB

Claude: Hilda I can explain

Hilda: clAuDEEeE

Claude: Hilda please

Hilda: I wiLl hit you

Claude: ok yeah please don't

Hilda: YOU ASKED FOR THIS!

Private chat: Lysithea, Prof. Byleth

Lysithea: uh... I think Hilda is trying to kill Claude

Prof. Byleth: ONE NORMAL DAY! THAT'S ALL I WANT!

Lysithea: yeah... That isn't happening any time soon.

Prof. Byleth: trust me, I've realized.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is very short, really dumb, and written in only adrenaline and my half asleep singular braincell. Enjoy-


	17. So, where the heck is this very unorganized thing going, anyway?

Hi again. So, I'm sorry again for the millionth time for not updating in forever. My mental health has taken a serious dive again, and I just lost someone as well. There's also school, and that hasn't made things any easier. There's also been complications with a friend of mine and a possible stalker, so we've been trying to help them with that. I also really just have problems with my own self worth and confidence in my work. I appreciate each and every one of you who stuck with me this long, and I PROMISE an update to this when my winter break starts. I know it's long overdue. I can't promise to ever have a consistent schedule, but I'm trying. I honestly feel like I'm just making excuses at this point, and I do feel pretty bad. I'll try to keep to at least one or two updates a month, with some exceptions. They'll most likely be on weekends. And honestly, I know some of you are probably disappointed in me. I get it. But I also want to remind you that I do have schoolwork, and am just a kid trying to make people smile with their stupid ideas.

**Author's Note:**

> If you have any suggestions for things you would like to see, leave a comment! Thank you for reading.


End file.
